The Struggle Collides with the Understanding

So often we look at out life and our "circumstances" and think why? Why GOD am I going through this struggle? The struggle that is what we most see in our hard moments. Our hard/difficult seasons we see the struggle. While God sees His child. HEAR me out GOD views us as HIS. He died for us not only so we can know Him but He DIED for that "struggle". We are always in constant questioning God. God why am I going through this? God why did you take that loved one away from me? God why did my parent's get divorced? God why did you not answer that prayer? Why do we think we can question God??? WHY! It isn't in our play book to question God. Don't you realize that struggle has a PURPOSE in your life? Don't you realize that GOD is the Author of your LIFE? Your life is written in a book in God's library, each and every day He knows! He knows before a word is on your tongue before a thought is in your head. God knows everything about you and HE is the one in control. So my question is why do we get mad when life doesn't go according to how we "planned"? I have learned you CANNOT plan life because you never know what will happen. You never know what crazy life changing events will happen. I have learned in the past 4 years that God is in control. YES I may not understand what He is up to but what I have learned is GOD works it ALL out for the good. Hear me out when I say that OUR GOD is a GOOD God. Yes we may view it as a crappy season we are walking through but let me ask you have you looked at this season how God see's the season you are in? God sees the struggle as your growth. I can boldly say this that these past 4 years I have gone through a lot of not good stuff, from struggling with suicide, to my best friend's dad's death, to my grandpa's death to my family members getting cancer. From insecurity to dealing with poor self image to harboring unforgiveness. It wasn't till recently I found all of those struggles HAD a purpose in my life! God uses the broken parts of us to make it beautiful. Think of stained glass it is broken but when it comes together it becomes beautiful. God doesn't have that "hurt" a part of our life if it wasn't needed. A really good analogy I heard a while back is this think of how a pearl is made. Some people think a pearl is made by a grain of sand getting lost in the ocean. It isn't a grain of sand. It is a food piece something the oyster just cannot swallow. So only one time a certain gland opens to coat that food particle in a silvery substance called nacre. AN IRRITANT THE OYSTER JUST CANNOT DIGEST. THAT storm/struggle HAS a purpose in your life. IT IS creating a pearl in your life. Pearls are RARE and EXPENSIVE. Then the world sees that pearl and they try to copy a pearl by speeding up the gestation process. IT TAKES PAIN AND SORROW to produce BEAUTY in the KINGDOM! God has a plan for that pain in your life! God has your back! So why do we stress over life when we cannot change it! Sometimes the only thing you can do is let go... LET GO! And trust God. Trust that God has your back. If God had Moses back how much more will He have your back. Believe that God is the God who FORMED YOU in your mother's womb. Who has your days ordained before the heavenly chorus. God has a plan and purpose for your life don't ever forget your purpose! The moment you forget your calling is the moment you begin to doubt your calling is the moment you lose your passion. YOUR PASSION is what drives your purpose. God has great things in store you just HAVE to trust Him with your life! :) I love you all! Let me know if you need prayer for anything! God bless you all!

More Than a Sentimental Truth but a Reality

Wow I honestly cannot believe that I haven't blogged in 6 months. It is crazy what God can do in your life in 6 months. These past 6 months have been some of the most craziest moments of my entire life. It is such a blessing to see how God keeps blessing me more and more, through out this journey called life. Some of the most key points I have learn is this YOU CANNOT PLAN YOUR LIFE. You cannot plan who will walk in and out, who will leave a mark on your heart. You cannot plan how your life will go, only God knows your story. But that is not what I want to talk about in this blog. I want to talk about this past week. I went to a huge event called Creation. This event was SERIOUSLY life changing! It is so crazy how much God can use you if you put yourself in a place that is will to be used. This week I learned so many things. Things I knew but never understood. I finally understood what it means to be open. To be open with one another the bible calls us to talk to others not to be islands. God never designed us to be closed with one another, our lives should be an open book. I mean think about it for a moment. If every one was open with each other how much would we realize that we all struggle with similar battles? The bible calls us to confess our sins to one another why? Not to be judge but to realize we ARE ALL HUMAN. AND we are all God's creation. And if we are all God's creation then that makes US ALL connected on a level. I am so sick of the "church" not being connected that is what is making us fall apart. Why is it so hard to get out of our "comfort zone" and be bold? It is because today's society says it is ok to be alone. That people won't "understand" you. I know I AM SO sick of that lie! It is so untrue why did God create Adam and Eve? Because humans need one another in this life! We need each other!!! And something crazy I finally comprehended is God SHOWS UP IN THE most crazy ways! One of my shifts was from 4am to 8:30am and time doesn't matter. My group and I ended up praying in the middle of the road and I cannot even tell you how thick God's presence was. God says come to me and pour your heart out like water. Why do you think God said water, why not milk, or wine or juice, but said water?? I think it is because of this. Water refreshes, replenishes and re hydrates. When we pour our hearts out to God like water it REFRESHES HIM! WOW... Crazy thought right there! God's presence is everywhere you just have to be open to let HIM MOVE the way HE WANTS TO MOVE!!! Another key point that I understood, is fellowship I have NEVER been that influenced by my brothers and sisters in Christ. I just wish more people understood this HEAR ME OUT! IT IS NOT ABOUT WHAT CHURCH YOU GO TO!!! That doesn't matter. What matters is the level of love you HAVE FOR YOUR fellow believers. The bible says accept those who are weak just as you accept the strong. So many people today have lost track of what LOVE IS... GOD IS LOVE. So his HEART is love! If God calls us to LOVE ALL why do we put up walls? In the end it is only just going to hurt you more. Walls only keep us away, locked up as a prisoner of our own emotions. Another thing that hit home was WE AS CHRISTIANS do NOT walk by EMOTIONS but by FAITH! Faith means trusting God with every detail of your life. I mean think about it, if he has a book on his shelf of your life why do we try to plan our lives? The last point is this GOD WORKS EVERYTHING FOR THE GOOD IN THE END! God seriously makes EVERYTHING fall into the perfect place! God never once said this journey would be easy but he said you will see me through the storm! A rainbow cannot shine until the storm has passed. STOP asking God why that certain "event" happened in your life but THANK GOD for that. WAIT what??!!! Did I seriously just say THANK GOD for your troubles, trials and sucky seasons? Yes I did. God deserves the highest praise and Glory because HE KNOWS what He is doing you just have to TRUST him!!! I know this was a bunch of random thoughts I just hope it made semi sense! I am praying as you read this God opens your heart too like he did mine this past week! I also encourage you all to do something random for someone today :) God Bless!

Lust or Love?

"What does love look like
It's the question
I've been pondering
What does love look like
What does love look like
It's the question
I've been asking
I once believed that love was romance
Just a chance
I even thought that love was for the lucky
And the beautiful
I once believed that love was a momentary bliss
Love was all this
All You ever wanted was my attention
All You ever wanted was love from me
All You ever wanted was my affection
To sit here at Your feet
So tell me
What does love look like
If all of life comes down to love
So tell me
What does love look like
And I sat down a little frustrated and confused
If all of life comes down to love
Then love has to be more than sentiment
More than selfishness and selfish game
Then I saw Him there hanging on a tree
Looking at me
I saw Him there hanging on a tree
Looking at me
He was looking at me
Looking at Him
Staring through me
I could not escape
Those beautiful eyes
And I began to weep and weep
He had arms wide open
Heart exposed
Arms wide open
He was bleeding, bleeding
This is how I know what love is"~Arms Wide Open-Misty Edwards

REALLY take a moment to look at these lyrics, to understand them. This has been hitting my heart lately so much. Are we chasing after the world or we chasing after God? Because the Bible says we cannot have both. I made a mistake the other day and fell for the worldy love. The world says it is ok, ok to get emotionally attached ok to give a piece of your heart to it and give the broken part to God. The world says it is ok to go one step past your standards your boundaries. It is not ok though. I have been believing a lie for too long. Too long missing out my time with God. God created us so we can love him not so we could get a momentary feeling from satisfaction of the flesh, but we were created to have a deep longing love for Jesus. God is love so if we are looking for what love is we won't find it in this world. God says greater is no love than to lay his life down for ones friends. God says chase after me and ALL your desires of your heart will be fulfilled in the RIGHT timing. But God is not the same as the world. Anything the world creates is a MIMIC of God's true love. Love that CASTS out ALL FEAR! Love that doesn't or won't ever harm you but has a plan and a purpose for your life, love that made you, love that DIED for you. God's love says we will not awaken love until it so desires, until God's timing is right. God says honor one another as BROTHERS and SISTERS in Christ that means thought wise too. God says if something is making you fall then cut it out of your life why because it is creating a FALSE love in your heart, where God's love should actually be. God says put Him first and ALL else will fall into place. God love doesn't pressure you into any situation you are going to regret in the future. Gods love is full of security and guides. Gods love doesn't lead you on but rather LEAD you. Gods love doesn't give feelings of emptiness but fullness. So often we get impatient and want instant gratification. But in the Bible it says LOVE IS PATIENT. Love isn't a boyfriend or a girl friend. It is God. Love is God we can never give love fully if we cannot accept God's love. If we go into any situation with what the world has taught us about love we are going to get in a huge mess of hurt and pain. God didn't create us to have that kind of love God created us to know HIS character to know HIS love. The world mimics is a counterfeit is a liar of what the true definition of love is. A false love yet we get so attached to it. We get so attached to the movies to the people of saying this is what LOVE looks like. That in our minds we get a twisted perspective of love, How love is suppose to be the skinny model with no flaws but perfect, love is suppose to make you and your husband have the perfect marriage in "your" world of happily ever after, how love says it is ok to think lustful thoughts towards that person. But that isn't love. GOD IS LOVE, love comes from above and is a heart thing not an emotional thing. Love is a spiritual thing. WE choose to love why? BECAUSE HE FIRST LOVED US. He didn't choose to love us, He loved us because we didn't know what love was. WE didn't ever know until He loved us. I am so tired of being caught up in this cycle because to be honest it was lust all the time. All the time, time wasted where I could have gotten to know God better. Not love but lust. Because I cannot have both in my heart. God loved us because He is God. I want love in my heart because emotions can be so misleading. If I want love then I need to know God. Know God no fear, Know Fear No God. Remember though perfect love cast out ALL FEAR. All my insecurities all my failures all my struggles. God's love is the ONLY love I need in this world, if so many people lived that what would we see in this world? Because once we know what LOVE IS, we can then love others. God had His arms wide open for me not only to run into them but to be EMBRACED by them. God loved us ever so dearly He gave Himself so we can KNOW LOVE. But we turn over and over again to Lust to what we think love is. We can't have both. ALL I NEED IS Jesus. And His love.

I hope this gave you a food for the thought tonight God Bless.

A Hope Unseen

Hope- It means so many different things. So many different translations but one thing that is true is it is a PROMISE. ~Hope~ Means not just wishful thinking but rather and eternal abundant promise. Hope means love and love means you trust. Trusting is not just with words but it is with your heart mind and soul. Trusting God. Life I know lately has seemed like a jumbled mess it was fine I had my "life" plan set in stone. It is funny though how God always has a better plan that what we could ever imagine. It is truly the definition of faith and hope and love. To trust Him even when you are scared. I find it odd how I always prayed God use me God I will go where you send me. And well then changes happen and I am sitting here saying God am I willing. But to be honest if I wasn't will that would be selfish of me. God called me with such a magnificent plan and purpose and this is what I have looked forward to ever since I got saved. How God is going to use me in His world to be a tool to save this lost generation. I should feel so blessed rather than stressed or scared. I should feel honored to take this step of faith and learn to rely on God and no one else. Because in the end HE WILL work it all out for my good. It is scary going into a unknown place knowing no one but that is where trust comes in. Why do you think the bible says the three greatest things are Faith, Hope and Love? Faith means walking a step forward not a step backwards even when you cannot see in front of you. God called us each individually for a unique plan and purpose He has for us in this life time. We are called to lead others to Christ to let them know there is a rich abounding truthful love still out there. To point them to the cross where our lives were bought with a HIGH price. God says take heart and have faith. I know in this next season in my life I have to daily walk in faith walk in the truth, and walk in the hope and the love. To say enemy you HAVE NO MORE fear on my life. God's promises ALWAYS remain. He never gives up on us. So truth be told I am excited to fulfill the Call of God upon my life.

God Bless