For I Am Changed

Harvesting berries it seems so simple but yet can be challenging at the same time...Beauty found in such simplicity.

God has been doing the most beautiful work in my life these past two months, toiling, challenging and straining at times but beautiful. If anything I have learned while harvesting wild black berries in my backyard is this that some of the most beautiful things in life, in my life especially have thorns.

No one likes getting pricked by the thorns and having the skin torn open because a thorn is stuck in the flesh, prying open up the rawness and causing pain.

I think of Jesus while writing this, the crown of thorns He wore on His head, ripping open His flesh so I could live. Thorns digging in His scalp, bleeding... bleeding for me...

Paul's thorn in his flesh how he pleaded with God 3 times to remove it but, The Lord kept it there... Why? Because it takes pain and frustration to produce beauty in the kingdom of Heaven.

Fruit it can be sweet but it can be bitter, while picking these berries I pondered the thought of the Father how every branch that doesn't produce fruit is cut of and thrown into the fire. Fruit it is not only for your enjoyment but the enjoyment of others. I have loved making jam and a couple pies with all the blackberries I have picked but what is more of joy is watching others try and eat the creations.

Life is a lot like blackberries at times moments can be sweet but also very bitter. Life can have its painful thorns, thorns that dig deep in your skin and cause you to bleed... But Christ has gone before me and endured far more than I will ever have to go through. For me to Live is Christ. My life is suppose to be a reflection of the gospel a reflection of the heart of the Father for others. It is only through the Spirit that we can produce healthy fruit, to let others taste and see how good God is in our life...

But Christ, can and will do far more than I dare to ever except or hope for in my life. He is making something sweet out of the bitter, somethings amazing from something I thought was broken. Turning those thorns into purpose, the thorns not so much to be punishment but to protect me from the enemy, who tries to steal the fruit tries to take what God has given, but the enemy is done... satan has lost and will continue to lose in my life and My GOD has WON. And the Battle is already won, my soul is secure found in the hope of Christ, I will walk my life for only the gospel. God is doing an amazing work and I am so excited to see what He is going to keep doing.

Knowing these thorns weren't ever to cause me pain but gain, gain for the sake of Christ. Gain to point others to the true gardener, the cultivator of my heart and faith. To point others back to the sake of the gospel the dying to self to gain Christ fully and more abundantly. To show others there is another side and I am standing on that, that the ONLY way we will overcome is by the BLOOD of the lamb and the WORD of our testimonies. I count it all as a loss for the sake of the gospel. What am I willing to give up for the sake of the gospel? Family, friends, jobs, my schedule, my idealizations, my plans and my dreams... It won't be easy it isn't ever easy to follow God more and more abundantly. To go where only He leads and no turning back. To say Lord, no matter what the cost to make your name known is worth it. That the thorns I got pricked on in my life, the thorns that made my heart bled are ALL worth it, if people are coming to know the Father. Coming to know and come back the arms of their first love. Knowing my thorns are nothing in comparison to the thorns my beloved Saviour wore to put His crown of glory on me. He took the thorns and the nails so I could live, not only live but live life more abundantly to live in light of who I AM IN CHRIST.

My identity is the nails, my identity is in the blood of the lamb that atoned for my mistakes, my failures, my struggles, my life. I count my life as loss for the sake of the gospel. There is a world and it is broken, it is dark and I am tired of just sitting back waiting for someone else, waiting for something to do the work that God has called me to do. It is true, this world is hungry and people are hungry for Christ, and the harvest is plentiful. If anything I have learned from picking berries is this, that there are SO many wild blackberries but not many people are willing to stand in the sun, the heat for hours to harvest enough berries to make a pie. Not many people are willing to do the labor, but I want to. I have lived my life so much in shame, in chains and in bondage I thought that I couldn't ever change. And that is true I can't change on my own, but with the power of the gospel I can do it, by the blood of the lamb I will overcome and not by my might or by my strength but the Joy of the LORD as my strength. The living and active God dwelling inside of me by the Holy Spirit through faith. The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. It is so easy to simply pass people over because we don't have time for them. I have come to a point where I am so thankful for the past two months. So thankful that my world got flipped upside down, so I could see the arms of the Father and not just see His mighty hand of RESCUE, Redemption and restoration. But see how He can use the most broken pieces, the most thorny parts of my heart to bring Him glory. My life isn't for me to live but for Christ to shine through.

I am excited to see what God is going to continue to do, to keep growing the garden He has cultivated in the depths of my heart, to see how He will keep moving in ways I didn't think He could move. He is good and He has got me so strongly in the palm of His hand. And I am only standing here today only by the grace of God and only by His love.... the Love He had to crucify His own son so I could live, and be surrounded by the Father's love...